August 31, 2012

Magic Mike (2012)

Channing Tatum, Matthew McConaughey

After my previous comments about Channing Tatum's lack of acting ability, I thought perhaps I had been a bit harsh. So in the interest of fairness, I decided to judge him on his own terms - male stripping. After all, he should be good at this, right?

And so I journeyed to the movie theater for the first time in awhile. I paid my $3.50 at the one-screen discount theater and settled into my old-school short-backed chair that felt like it might collapse under my weight at any moment. I was worried about my view possibly being blocked, since this theater clearly had not been renovated since the invention of tiered seating, but only about fifteen people showed for the movie, so I was in luck. Then...

I started laughing the moment the movie started. Literally, from the first line (which, by the way, is Matthew McConaughey saying the whole "I see a lotta lawbreakers up in here" line from the previews). I continued to laugh throughout the rest of the movie, bordering on hysterics at points. This may have been the most unintentionally hilarious movie I've ever seen. At one point, Matthew McConaughey (who apparently causes the majority of the laughs in this movie) is wearing an honest-to-God crop top and spandex daisy dukes while gyrating behind another guy in the mirror, teaching him to "dance." I cried a little. I really did. It's brilliant, really. They manage to appeal to the ladies with the whole stripper theme, but throw in enough homoeroticism to attract the gay viewers too!

What surprised me the most was the appearance of other semi-famous people in this movie! Two of the other strippers included this guy from CSI Miami and this guy from White Collar on USA. So maybe not A-List, but at least recognizable. And now, even more recognizable apart from their faces. (eh-oh!) Even Olivia Munn got naked for the movie! Who knew people were clamoring to be a part of this cinematic masterpiece?

The downside? Plot. Not the actual storyline, since I wasn't expecting much on that front, but the fact that they kept trying to work so much actual plot in! People don't go to watch this movie for the acting! The other major bummer was the main girl. She was like a white version of Michelle Rodriguez, right down to the tough girl frown she sports throughout the entire movie, thereby making it hard to believe anyone would be into her. (p.s. am I the only person who can't help but say the word "girlfight" in the annoying Lil' John/Big Boi voice every time I see Michelle Rodriguez??)

Final word: Do you really want to be the only person NOT able to make fun of this movie?


  1. I got the same entertainment from this movie for $3.50 as Thunder from Down Under in Vegas, which charged $40 cover. You actually see more nudity in this movie than the live show....

  2. Big Boi and Lil Jon do not have the same voice

    1. This is true. I just didn't want to spread inaccurate information if I just cited Lil' John, since I wasn't 100% sure it was his voice that says that annoying line.